almost 20 ♥

Marriage is hard work guys. Some people say marriage is easy... it's just a walk in the park.  And I don't understand that. because what planet are you from? which two people anywhere in this galaxy are perfect? There has to be conflict and lack of communication and unfair expectations in any relationship with two people. Because it's natural. Because we're human. Because we're instinctively selfish and because if there wasn't, what would be the point of marriage? It's supposed to be the ultimate picture of how Christ loves us - and without growing and pulling and pressure and heat and heartache how would we grow? How would we learn? How would we be more like Christ? We can't get there without growth.

Some people say marriage is impossible. And I don't understand that. because anything is possible *with God*.  I know there are exceptions - abuse, infidelity, addiction - but *sometimes* even with & through all those things God will work. He can change. He can make you new. Make your marriage new. He's applying the heat and molding the clay and stretching you beyond anything you thought you would ever be able to endure. Pain beyond recognition sometimes. All to make your marriage or in some cases maybe just YOU into the ultimate testimony of His dying love for us. 

But the enemy hates it. 

He'll tear it down tiny piece by tiny piece if he has to. And if you'll let him, he'll slither ever so quietly into the tiniest hair line fracture and take your marriage down from the inside out one thought at a time. 

But choice. 

Choose not to let him. Choose to fill those gaps ladies. Choose to let Jesus pour out of you and cement those gaps shut with unselfishness. With an open heart. With Mercy. With forgiveness. With time. With priority. With sometimes I don't want to do this but I'm just going to do it anyways. With a little Victoria's secret & a few chocolate chip cookies. (cause I'm old fashioned like that) And because deep down ladies, our men just want to be respected. They want to know we're proud of who they are. They want to know they're enough for us.  Enough at 20 and still enough at 40 50 & 60. 

You can't do it on your own.

God wants us to need Him in our marriages.  And sometimes you might have to wait.
 Months, years maybe even until heaven, i don't know...
now i know, not everyone will agree with me and that's ok.  I also understand every relationship is unique and complicated and sometimes for safety or other reasons the end of a marriage is necessary ... but as a general rule and because like everything else in life - stuff takes work. It takes time. It takes discipline and it takes choice. And because I've never seen a perfect long lasting no effort marriage just fall into anyone's lap.  And I get it... it'll never be perfect like in the movies we all watch or in the books we read but it will be worth it. Pinky promise.♥

much love ♥


  1. Congratulations on your almost 20th.
    Come next June me and my hubby will celebrate our 50th. Yes, we have had many bumps along the way,the good along with the bad, the laughter along with the sadness but for 'better or worse' we hung in there and never went to bed angry and telling each other that we love them before going to bed and each morning when we woke and many times during the day.
    Don't waste your time and energy on anger; but focus on the happy times and always have trust and respect for each other .
    Wishing you both the very best to you both.

  2. Congratulations!! That is wonderful! My husband and I just celebrated 15 :)
    My mom told me that you have to work on your marriage every day and that there will be days when you don't like each other but you still love each other and you work on it together.
    Thx for sharing!

  3. happy almost anniversary! I giggled at the victoria secret and cookies comment because the cookies could get in the way of the VS, ;).

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  6. I stumbled upon this post--looking for renovation ideas. This was the post I was needing to read today. Thank you for writing not only about material items, but for also writing about, and reminding us of, the vital importance of keeping Christ in our marriage, and more importantly, keeping Christ in the center of our marriage. Much needed post, today. I thank you. :)


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